Raising Children in the Diaspora

admin · Raising Children in the Diaspora

Raising Children in the Diaspora

Chances are the longer one resides in the Diaspora, the higher the chances of raising one's children abroad.

Obviously, residential choices; types of schools; safety of the children under nanny care, in day cares, in schools (where guns, drugs, etc. as possible); safety in their neighbourhood; racism, discrimination, xenophobia (fear of foreigners), which expose them to racial slurs, bigotry, etc.; exposure to deviant behaviours -- use of cuss words, robberies (such as that carried out recently by 4 girls from affluent middle-class neighbourhoods), sex as minors with potential for STDs and teenage pregnancies, and gang influences are some of the normal concerns any parent will have.

For non-parents/guardians how do you plan to deal with these issues should you decide to raise your own children in the Diaspora?

For any forummer who was raised as a child in the Diaspora, what steps did your parents/guardians take? What were your coping skills and what effect did these influences have on who you have become today?

Cxsm
10th April '04

© Cxsm 2004 All Rights Reserved

admin

[Ghanaians] Re: Raising Children in the Diaspora

You have picked a very good topic and question. As an African American, allow me my 2cents.

In today's America, one MUST have a father and mother in the home to rear a sane child into abulthood. The parents MUST be very strict and dedicated to the child's needs for at least 18 yrs straight DAILY. A child's day, especially in his/her teens years must almost be planned through the parents to the minute. Such is needed to protect the child from the mental poisoning of the daily media-influences most people born in America fall prey to very early in life.

The habits immigrants bring to America, especially concerning their girl children, are much needed. Meaning no boyfriends or girlfriends until you finish high school, hitting the books and bring home honors grades(mind on the books not the boys). Children in house by nightfall. No smoking, no drinking, no tattoos or piercings, no hip-hop designer wear clothing. No visits to your home by other children friend of your child's during the school week. This is something American people have long forgotten, as we have gotten drunk on women and childrens rights at the expense of strong family-extended family structure. Not that such rights aren't important, it is just somethings have suffered and almost become absent that were, in the past, VERY IMPORTANT to rearing a good, well-rounded, moral adult.

Such is the irony of life, as a coin has two sides. One can face negativity, concerning children on both sides of the ocean. Unfortunately, here is an example: http://allafrica.com/stories/200404160817.html

afr_amer_jetsetter
4/04

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Re: Raising Children in the Diaspora

When in America and you need a respite or mental getaway, read QUITTING AMERICA by Randall Robinson. Peace and quiet can be found in the Western world.

Yao
[Net-Liberia]
5/24/04

admin

admin

Re: Raising Children in the Diaspora

Whilst it may sound simplitic - you do the very best you can, the 'old school' methods may have to be modified but they work. Remember that the children belong to God, you're just their earthly guardian so calling on him for guidance and help can't go amist.

Like most things its the chasing of material things and keeping up with the jones that can making parenting hard, but mostly to raise children you have to be there and make time (above all keep a sense of humour).
Your children need to feel that they have access to you 24/7 that they are more important than the job, the football game, the car, etc, etc. It the song of our youth people today that parents are not their for them.

It's takes time and being emotionally bonded to your child. Having been raised abroad to my teens, then in Africa (which now I'm enternally grateful for) and now raising a teenage girl abroad I speak from a stance of experience. I often see people bringing their youngs ones up to 'fit in' or emulate the culture they are living in whilst totally forgeting their own value systems.
If we look at the example of many great people check out how they were parented generally speaking with some firm discipline and boundaries.

Funk© Nana <funkenana@.y...com

admin

Someone's response to EUR re: hiphop music

"Hi ...,
I have always enjoyed reading your e-mails and have my own comments about rap lyrics and videos.
I am 29 and a 4th grade teacher. I enjoy several genres of music including hip-hop and rap. But my enjoyment comes to a complete halt when I hear students (10 and younger) singing/rapping some of the lyrics they hear via radio or CDs. And radio filtering does little to cover a swear, so most children know the entire song's contents (and in most cases... the meaning).

But what makes it worse is to see our young, little girls throwing their bodies (popping, shaking, and what have you) in the exact manner of what they view in these videos. The dances are so sexual in nature that it looks perverse to see a 5, 6 or 7 year old grind like these video 'ladies.'
There has to be a stop somewhere. I'm not advocating the complete censorship of all media and entertainment but something still should be done about it. And BET should be the front-runners in this to begin the end of it ... since they are here for 'Black' Entertainment.
Thank you for letting me say my piece."

Ms. CB

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